My Place

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A place for brutally honest writing.

17 November 2009

That Girl


I stand facing
the mirror

my insides boil
and burn

With a surge
of hate
the mirror is

But now there
are hundreds
of her
and the hate

I glance
at my bloody fist
still clenched
ready to destroy
that girl
I hate so much

But no matter
how hard
I try to shatter
her image
she just
and enrages me more

I give up
tears streaming
down my face
I fall
to the floor
and cry
until I cannot anymore

From the floor
I cannot see her
but I know
she's there
and I hate her
for still being there
for enduring
when all I want
is to give up

I curl
into a ball
and think back
to whom
I used to be
I remember
everything I was
and hate that girl
for forcing me
to become her

I remember
everything I used to want
when I was little
the dreams
the hopes
the wishes
I was gonna go far
but now
I'm dead

I begin to cry again
it pains me
to think
I am dead
I have become
the girl
I never
wanted to be

I stand up
and see that
monstrous girl
looking at me

The tears are still
but now
I know
that I can beat
that girl

I leave the bathroom
and for the first time
in months
happiness jumps in
my stomach

All of this
will soon be done
the pain
will disappear

I now know
I must slay
the monster

She will die

It's the only way

1 comment:

  1. OMG! Very dramatic! Reminds me of my depressed days.

    Beautiful Dreamer